My driver's license unexpectedly expired on my birthday this year. I say unexpectedly because it has always been renewed, without fail, since I first acqquired it at the age of 17. The DMV is supposed to notify you when your license isn't automatically renewed, but apparently the clerk in charge of keeping me abreast of this development was furloughed and I was blissful unaware of my scofflaw status. Once it was helpfully brought to my attention (thank you, local parks and recreation attendant), I scooted over to the DMV to rectify the situation. Except that after 20-odd years, I have to take the written test again. Now, when I first took the written test all those years ago the DMV handbook was more like a pamphlet. A lot has happened vehicularly-speaking since then and the handbook is more akin to the tax code these days. So the nice folks at the DMV sent me off with a temporary license and a DMV handbook, and an admonishment to study and come back for the test in a week or so.
Here's where things get irritating (and face it, when it comes to me you knew we'd arrive at irritating pretty quickly): I went to BevMo today to pick up a bottle of wine and some champagne for New Year's Eve. The clerk asked me for my ID (thank you very much, nice young BevMo boy), and I produced my license.
Clerk: Um, this is expired.
Me: Yes, I know. But here's my temporary license too.
At this point, another clerk interupted our transaction.
Clerk #2: Is it paper? Because that's not a valid form of ID. We can't accept it.
People, I am 42. While I'm somewhat youthful in appearance, by no stretch of the imagination could I be taken for someone under 21 years of age. My driving privilege expired -- not my birthdate. For cryin' out loud. The nice young Trader Joe's guy had no problem a few weeks ago when I used my expired license to validate my pinot grigio purchase. I'm all for responsible sales of alcohol and whatnot but honestly! What has happened to common sense these days?
And you know what the BevMo clerk said to me next?
"Just have a friend come with you to buy your stuff."
I felt like I was 18 again. Could someone please pass me the Boones Farms?